Like Riding a Horse

“Taking on a challenge is a lot like riding a horse, isn’t it? If you’re comfortable while you’re doing it, probably doing it wrong.” - Ted Lasso

We are faced with challenges everyday. Some big, some small. As hard as we try, we cannot avoid them. But what about the challenges we create for ourselves?

Be honest with yourself. Because of your repeated behavior, your brain has been rewired to rely on pornography. Over time, the problem has gradually gotten worse, and might have even become an addiction. Whether you turn to it when you’re sad or angry or lonely, your brain now thinks you need it.

Do you want to break free from pornography?

Get ready for a challenge. What I am about to suggest is going to sound very uncomfortable and put you in a place of vulnerability, but I can guarantee it is necessary and 100% worth it.

Find an accountability partner.

Think of someone you trust. Someone that would do anything for you. Someone who is always there for you.

1. Tell them about your struggles. We are told in James 5:16, “confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed.” The truth is that pornography thrives on anonymity. You can struggle with pornography your entire life and no one would know. How is that possible? Because it loves to be in darkness. So, how are we supposed to overcome it? Get it into the light. When you tell someone, it is no longer your burden to bear alone. Remember, “you are not alone in this.” However, if you fail to tell anyone, no one can help you.

I remember the first person I told about my addiction. I was shaking and I could barely get the words out. I was so ashamed of the person I had become. But do you want to know what they did? They cried with me, hugged me, and told me they were proud of me. Why? Because the first step to overcoming a problem is admitting you have one. The second step is confessing it to someone. The last thing I expected was the grace that was extended to me. I let sin cloud my judgment of what others would think of me and waited years to seek help. God’s people are the most gracious people in the world. Don’t ever forget that. Don’t wait to seek help.

2. Get rid of triggers together. “And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body go into hell” (Matthew 5:30). Pornography also thrives on its accessibility. We live in a world that loves technology, so much so that we are almost forced to center our lives around it. We all have cell phones, TVs, computers, etc. Right now, you could pull up a pornographic site in 5 seconds or less, if you so desired. But you don’t, that’s why you are here. You want to be better. Let’s look at some ways you can overcome your addiction.

Below, I have posted a link to our resources page. On this page, you will find several websites that can be used as great tools in your journey to overcoming pornography addiction. I strongly recommend researching each of these resources and talking to your accountability partner about them.

The two I personally use are Brainbuddy and Covenant Eyes. The combination of these two programs, plus added screen time settings on my iPhone (password set by accountability partner), is perfect for me.

It may seem uncomfortable to have this conversation with someone, but once you do, you will be glad you did.

You are getting ready to take on a challenge. I encourage you to hop on that horse, no matter how uncomfortable it is.